Do you remember your favorite blanket, teddy bear or something that you held close to you when you were young? Now do you remember when you had to give it up because you were a "big girl/boy"? Well....this is how I feel about giving up my smokes :(
To be honest I haven't been doing to well. I have cut back greatly but haven't "kicked" the habit completely. I have been having 2 or 3 cigarettes a day. It has worked well because it is just enough to take the edge off. The part that is making this the hardest is my husband is still smoking. Every so often he will forget and light up in the house and it totally screws me up. It isn't all his fault tho...it just takes so much will power and I just don't have it right now...not with Christmas coming and getting ready for it. I know, I know, just another excuse not to totally stop and to be honest maybe it is but it is just so hard!! My hubby says that since he has the week during Christmas and New Years off it will be a good time for him to quit too....we'll see. I believe it will be easier for him then me, but I am the one who has no choice but to quit. Last Monday I finally asked the doctor for a chest Xray because my chest hurt so bad and I thought at one point I was having a heart attack but come to find out when your lungs are inflamed they can spasm and make your chest hurt. The good news is that the chest xray showed nothing out of the norm and the doctor is thinking that I either have a nasty virus that just doesn't want to leave me or I am in the beginning stages of a chronic lung disease...great!!!! They put me on antibiotics AGAIN and also 2 types of inhalers which seems to be working. This is not fun and pretty scary too. To think that I am only 33 and starting a lung disease already is really scary.
Now to why I haven't just stopped? I have no idea!!!! I wish I could answer that. I know it is bad. I know every time I smoke a cigarette it is making my lungs worse and I am slowly killing myself....still no answer. I have read that stopping smoking is harder then quitting street drugs....if that is true I am not sure. I know what you are thinking, if your not a smoker, "dumbass". Come on admit it you think that I am stupid and should have gotten rid of all of the smokes when the dr told me what was going on...and you are totally right!!! If you are a smoker or an ex smoker then you probably totally understand what I am saying. This is the hardest thing that I have done and I am praying for the strength to stop completely. I just wish I knew if there was a trick or something. This time around I have figured out it is not so much the nicotine that keeps me coming back, it is the habit. The habit is the worst to break. I try not to talk on the phone much because there is something about smoking and being on the phone...don't ask. The morning smoke isn't bad for me. I can get up and go a little bit without having that morning cigarette (unlike my hubby). The after you eat smoke is getting easier. Now after dinner I just go straight to washing the dishes and cleaning up the kitchen before I really want that after dinner smoke. I now have a bottle of water I carry with me all the time so when I want that smoke I just keep taking small sips. There is a down side to the bottle tho....way too much time spent in the bathroom..Hahaha! But it does take that edge away for a little bit and it gives my hands and mouth something to do...that is the key I believe, keeping things busy. I can't chew gum as it always gives me a headache so I have stuff to suck on which works only for a little bit, but it does help.
I am hoping that I can figure this out soon and be smoke free by the new year! For all of those people out there that have quit smoking cold turkey...I am on my hands and knees bowing to you for your strength and commitment and asking for your help on how to just give it up! I am open for suggestions of any kind. For all you non smokers out there I am willing to hear the nasty comments you may wish to say....as long as they are not so mean you make me want to smoke...hahaha!!
Hope you all are doing great out there and are ready for the holidays. I am on my way slowly but I am one of those people that wait til last minute anyways...guess I like the stress.
Have a wonderful and blessed day :)
3 comments:
Hang in there! I quit a pack and a half habit 7 1/2 years ago. I couldn't do it cold turkey, but Nicorette gum did the trick in 5 months. I also waited until spring so I could work in my yard to get over the cravings. My husband still smokes and I had to threaten him to get him to not smoke in my car or around me. I'm proud of the fact that I did it in spite of him. My chest hurt, I had a nasty cough and every morning coughed up nasty stuff. I got scared because I was so out of breath just carrying a laundry basket up the stairs.
My doctor told me my lungs sound like a non-smoker's now, I don't cough, I'm calmer, I rarely get colds and best of all - I can breathe!
Don't be too hard on yourself and don't give up. There is no magic time limit you have to meet. You can do it!
Thank you so much for your encouragement!! This is the hardest thing I have ever had to do but now it has gotten to the point of HAVING to do it. I just contacted Yale who is having a study for helping you stop and one of the good things is they pay you for your time...a little bit of a bonus :) I think waiting till spring is an awesome idea! The windows will be open I will have my hands in the dirt and I will be busy doing so much outside...makes a lot of sense. Thank you soooo much for your help and kind words
I feel for you!! No nasty comments here I'm trying to quit, well let me take that back, I'm wanting to quit...I've tried and its so hard! I HAVE cut back, but I'm so tired of being out of breath,having an inhaler cause of asthma, coughing in the mornings and just the over all tired feeling that I know is brought on by smoking! IT SUCKS!!!!!!! I've been keeping my hands busy with barn chores and its helping but ya know, I keep taking stupid breaks to smoke, its partly habit...partly nicotine. The patch worked great when I quit before!!!!! MUCH better than the gum!!!!!!! The gum never worked for me....the one other time I just slowly cut back rationed off my ciggs until I was down to one a day.....over a months time..that worked well too....good luck!!!!
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